Avoiding an Ashley Madison crisis

By Lavern Nissley, Tuesday@10:10 blog post

Imagine how you would feel if you were one of the 32 million subscribers to Ashley Madison, the affair-seeking site that was recently hacked. The leaked list of subscribers, assumed to be private, can now be searched by name or email. Ed Stetzer, writing for Christianity Today, estimated that 400 church leaders (pastors, elders, staff, etc.) would be resigning this past weekend due to the damaging exposure of their indiscretions.

Yes, the idea of paying for a "discreet affair" is dark, despicable and rooted in relational disconnection and deception. Although many things that used to be wrong have now become OK, having an affair is still taboo. In fact, 81.7% of all Americans believe it is wrong.

But before we start throwing stones at others, let's take a look in the mirror. How disconnected and how transparent am I in my own marriage or relationship? These are typically the core/deeper issues, not sex per se.

We're making available two relevant resources below from our couple's class, The RINGS Experience. It's a quick, free, 2 page download, and we encourage your honest reflections with both of them.

• Journey to Disconnectedness - Developed by Tim and Linda Buttrey after they experienced an affair and saw their marriage restored.
• Questions for Self-reflection - A simple survey on determining how healthy, transparent and "high definition" your relationship is. Adapted from Bethany and Scott Palmer and Lynne M. Thompson.

Hopefully, you weren't on the Ashley Madison list. But even more, we hope you are doing everything possible to protect your marriage connection and transparency. It is so worth it!

Image courtesy of marin at FreeDigitalPhotos.com

RINGS disconnection and transparency
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