Marriage Predictors

John Gottman, a “mathematical” marriage researcher, has identified four predictors of divorce known as “The Four Horsemen.” On the positive side, he has also identified four predictors of marriage success.

Predictors of divorce
  • Stonewalling – withdrawing and refusing to participate in communication
  • Criticism – nagging without warmth and open-mindedness
  • Defensiveness – not take responsibility for contributions to problems
  • Contempt – a total lack of respect for partner
Predictors of marriage success
  • More positives than negatives – at least a 5:1 ratio
  • Repair attempts – “putting on the brakes” instead of continuing unproductive cycles
  • Soft start-up – gentle in sharing complaints or desires
  • Accepting influence – not just understanding partner, but actually accepting of his or her ideas
Source: Gottman, John. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
(New York NY: Three Rivers Press, 1999)